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(1). What they used to just call “account opening”. It’s still just “account opening”.
“So, I reached out to our client onboarding team today to see when we should expect the account to be open. They asked us for a few missing things, which I was hoping you could get from the client. Let’s see: birth certificate … mother’s maiden name … and … umm … urine sample. That should do it. Thanks a bunch!”
(1). Two things that can’t be compared … like Anchorman and the lowly Anchorman II.
“It’s apples and oranges. We build gizmos, they build doohickies. Totally different businesses.”
(1). A nationwide tour you convince your bosses that you and your new, super-hot assistant should take to market some new product to your regional sales teams. Be prepared to be fired and/or divorced by the time you get home.
“Hey Ken, I think we need a roadshow to get the word out about the new whatever-it-is we’re rolling out next quarter. Happy to spearhead the effort on this. I think we should start in Honolulu and work our way east.”
