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(1). A department which doesn’t produce any revenue … you know, like the one 90% of you work in.
“So, we all know it’s been a tough year. The good news is that layoffs are going to be focused in the cost centers … as always! Now, give each other a high five and let’s go sell some bonds!”
(1). How Ops or Tech tells you they have no interest in doing whatever it is you want them to do.
“Hmm … so, you’d like us to take over the quarterly account performance metrics reporting … well, I think the first step is for us to conduct a level of effort analysis to see if we are able to resource that … we’ll get back to you ….”
(1). A spectacular event in which an employee completely loses his or her marbles and goes all Michael Douglas on the office.
(2). A far less exciting event involving an embarrassingly loud rant about something or other by a disgruntled employee in the breakroom.
“It was crazy. One minute, Judy and I were talking about last night’s Survivor tribal council and the next minute – blagh! – she goes all postal about something Nick said to her about timesheets or whatever. Like that’s what I need at 9 a.m.!”
