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(1). A term used when trying to deflect a client’s request for your opinion on the future of the economy or, even worse, his investment performance.
“Look, Brenda, I don’t want to give you some kind of crystal ball analysis about what’s going to happen two, three years from now. What I can tell you is that your overall portfolio could’ve done a lot worse considering all the Facebook stock we bought!”
(1). Where Jeffrey Skilling and Bernie Madoff now go to school.
“Hey, Gil … you should probably stop telling people at the bar that our returns are going to be down next quarter. I’m pretty sure that’s a one-way ticket to Graybar University for a CEO ….”
Props to Tim P. for the submission.
(1). That anxiety-inducing term every department faces at comp time. Will it go up? Will it go down? Did we hit our numbers? Where am I on the performance chart this year? Yikes!
“So, team, unfortunately, it looks like we’re going to have to reduce headcount this year by at least two. The good news is, no one likes Larry and Monica, so they’re out. The bad news is … Larry, Monica, can you please see my in my office after this meeting? Thanks a bunch.”
