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(1). Some kind of ridiculous psycho-babble about feeling your client’s pain or some crap.
“Alright, team…this is Richard. He wrote a book on how to improve your emotional intelligence. I don’t know what it means either, but it sounds like something we should have, so you’re going to spend the rest of the day hearing about it while I hit the range. Have fun!”
(1). A conference (1) that requires travel to a hotel or resort (usually connected to a golf course), (2) whose sessions can be easily avoided, and (3) which includes multiple occasions to generously partake of the hotel bar, usually in the form of sponsored cocktail hours.
“I love these boondoggles. Nothing but golf, booze and time away from the kids. By the way, did anyone go to that ‘Ethical Financial & Banking Practices’ seminar? No? Ok good, I didn’t either. 2008 is going to be a great year!”
(1). To grossly overreact to a minor error or mishap, resulting in unproductive meetings, useless checklists, indecipherable procedures, overlapping layers of approval and other bureaucratic nonsense.
“Talk about killing a fly with a sledgehammer! After Sam double-billed that client last month, they now want us to have two managers review and approve all our bills before they go out! Why do I have to be punished because Sam can’t send out mail properly?!”
