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(1). How Ops or Tech tells you they have no interest in doing whatever it is you want them to do.
“Hmm … so, you’d like us to take over the quarterly account performance metrics reporting … well, I think the first step is for us to conduct a level of effort analysis to see if we are able to resource that … we’ll get back to you ….”
(1). To organize annoying social events for your employees thinking they just need to spend even more time together to start getting along.
“Okay, guys…I think with the disappointing comp numbers and recent defections, we could use a little teambuilding around here. So…we’re going bowling!”
(1). Something used in management reporting that probably means you’re intentionally double-billing your clients every now and then.
“Okay, and if you’ll all flip to page 3, you’ll see our double revenue numbers for this year. Not as solid as we would have liked, but we’re looking to ramp it up for next year. Some kind of bundling fee or customer service charge or something…”
Props to Hilari for the submission.
