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(1). Those useless reports on who does what, how many customers they work with, and so on, and so forth…. The upside: It keeps whole departments of analysts employed. God Bless America (and/or India)!
“So, Jeremy ran the metrics on our regional sales teams. It turns out we have more customers in densely-populated areas than in rural ones. Go figure.”
(1). An actual signature (with a pen). Remember those?
“So, Compliance told us we need a wet signature on this document. Gross.”
(1). To very publicly assume responsibility for a certain project or assignment so that your bosses will notice (see go-getter) in the hope that it will lead to either a promotion, raise or both.
“Gil, we’re impressed at how you’ve really taken ownership of this project and made it your own. Now, I’m not exactly thrilled that you’ve devoted so much of your work day to planning the office Christmas party, but…”
