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(1). Those useless reports on who does what, how many customers they work with, and so on, and so forth…. The upside: It keeps whole departments of analysts employed. God Bless America (and/or India)!
“So, Jeremy ran the metrics on our regional sales teams. It turns out we have more customers in densely-populated areas than in rural ones. Go figure.”
(1). What people start ending emails with after being promoted to senior management.
“Got it. thx“ (FYI – This is all you’re going to get out of them, so just consider it an approval. They’ll never know.)
(1). A euphemism for “my old job” used by people trying to make it look like they have way more experience than they really do.
“In my former life, I used to manage a team responsible for lavatory paper management. It was a lot of responsibility, but I think I handled the pressures of leadership fairly well.”
