BLOG
(1). A sharp statistical uptick. Like every stock price when we thought Trump wasn’t crazy.
“So, last quarter’s net surplus seems to have been a bit of a pig in the python. After reviewing the annualized numbers, we’re basically flat for the year, mostly due to the drop-off in sales in the northeast region thanks to Larry’s crumbling marriage.”
Props to Kevin for the submission!
(1). n. Congrats guy! You’re the Eddie Van Halen of reporting. The Steven Tyler of the boardroom. You are officially the guy who everyone else in the office envies. Colleagues want to be you and clients want to be with you. Your trip up the corporate ladder has been swift and easy. That corner office and sexual harassment suit are right around the corner!
(2). n. An individual who happens to be in the right place at the right time…..somehow, all the time.
(3). adj. A term that is used to describe someone identified by management as a key player to the company’s success. This person may or may not be doing any real work, but hey, good for them.
“Steve? That kid’s a rockstar! He’s in early, and loves to burn the midnight oil. It’s amazing that every time something goes right, he’s in the room. It must be him right? I mean, I see him on Facebook a lot during the day, but that’s probably just him taking a break. Hmm. Whatever, let’s give him a company car and an expense account!”
(1). What Congress does … all the time.
“Sure we avoided the fiscal cliff today, but all we’ve really done is kick the can down the road…thank god I’ll be long dead before any of this really matters!”
