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(1). What everybody wants, but only Amazon seems to get.
“So riddle me this, Sam. If we invest all of this money into frozen bananas, what’s the ROI going to be? How will these bananas help this company become…top banana?” (womp womp)
(1). Taking the proper amount of a time (read: an exorbitant amount of time) to vet through a current prospect, acquisition, project, endeavor, thought, initiative, yadda, yadda, yadda.
“Alright everybody, as Sandy always says, we have to do our due diligence on this. I put the timeline at 4-6 months to decide whether or not we are going to buy 1% milk or whole milk for the common kitchen area. Andrea, you have 2 weeks to put a deck together on the pro’s and con’s for this initiative.”
(1). A spectacular event in which an employee completely loses his or her marbles and goes all Michael Douglas on the office.
(2). A far less exciting event involving an embarrassingly loud rant about something or other by a disgruntled employee in the breakroom.
“It was crazy. One minute, Judy and I were talking about last night’s Survivor tribal council and the next minute – blagh! – she goes all postal about something Nick said to her about timesheets or whatever. Like that’s what I need at 9 a.m.!”
