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(1). To check in on, and possibly feed, the coma patients in the hospital.
“Okay, Alice…since it’s you’re first week on the job, you get to water the vegetables tonight. Just try not to Garp any of them.”
Props to Cid R. for the submission.
(1). An unnecessarily long and painful process requiring co-workers to “anonymously” highlight each other’s shortcomings to management. While many people graciously decline to say anything too damaging, some use the review as an opportunity to settle personal scores or to climb the corporate ladder in the traditional way (i.e. by crushing their co-workers).
“Okay, team. It’s time for 360 reviews again. You need to ask at least 10 people and, remember, I don’t really read these things, so feel free to say anything you like.”
(1). Acts of public self-congratulation among co-workers, often after being notified of an increase in compensation, and almost always in front of people who did not share in that increase.
“Oh sure, while those guys are giving each other high fives over in Sales, we’re stuck here in Accounting doing the real work!”
