(1). Reduction In Force – to be laid off, in governnment or teaching parlance.
“The mayor of NYC is calling for thousands of teachers to be RIF-ed but the president of the UFT says it’s all B.S.”
RIF-ed
Woodcock-Johnson
(1). Some kind of new IQ test the government makes kids take to see if they’re going to be doctors or…not doctors.
“My son found the Woodcock-Johnson to be a little overwhelming…I think he definitely needs to have extra time when he takes his SATs…my attorney thinks so, too.”
Props to Katie B. for the submission.
Xanax
(1). What most people take after work, but what teachers take before work. God bless our children.
“Ugh…I’ve got lunch duty today. Good thing I sprinkled some Xanax into my coffee this morning…”
Props to V for the submission.
RANDOM LINGO
Graybar University
(1). Where Jeffrey Skilling and Bernie Madoff now go to school.
“Hey, Gil … you should probably stop telling people at the bar that our returns are going to be down next quarter. I’m pretty sure that’s a one-way ticket to Graybar University for a CEO ….”
Props to Tim P. for the submission.
Shift Gears
(1). A racing-inspired term for changing the subject during a meeting or conference call, usually used when the discussion has drifted into uncomfortable territory for one or more participants and they wish to bring it back to a more friendly or positive topic.
“Okay, why don’t we shift gears here and get back to the holiday promotion. I don’t like where this ‘you guys don’t pay your bills’ conversation is going.”